And another thing she doesn’t mind saying: given the way it “quite literally upended [their] entire life and set [them] on a path [they] never saw coming,” it’s all the fault of Reece’s Rainbow. 

Because if Melissa hadn’t discovered what she calls the “rabbit hole” of special needs adoption via RR, she and Devin never would have found Givens, their seven-year-old son adopted from Bulgaria. 

“I looked at the kids on Reece’s Rainbow for hours, reading about each one of them, and it forever changed something in me,” says Melissa, a 44-year-old social media manager. “I always explain it as, once I knew these children existed and the type of life they were living, I couldn’t go on living as if I didn’t know.”

Nor could she and Devin, a 35-year-old technology manager at an electric cooperative, go on living like before once they laid eyes on “Yaeger,” a tiny toddler with deep brown eyes and spina bifida. 

“We just knew instantly he was the one,” Melissa says. “I can’t really explain the reason. We looked through all the kids, but my heart told me we were meant to pursue Givens, and my husband agreed.”

The couple really didn’t have any experience with the special needs world before finding RR, and they hadn’t truly considered adoption for their family of four, either. But that all changed in 2022, when they brought Givens home to their tiny northern Indiana hamlet. 

The four-year-old was quiet and reserved, unwilling to say much or even cry, and he certainly didn’t know how to play. Even so, there was a spark of life evident to Melissa, Devin and their two biological children, Hayden and Jocelyn. 

“His greatest source of fun was throwing his shoes or toys and having us bring them back,” his adoptive mom recalls. “Still, there was a joy in him, a timid joy, but you didn’t have to look hard to see it.”

It didn’t help that just one day after becoming an American, Givens kicked off a six-month stretch of hospital stays, including 10 eventual surgeries. Thankfully, having a new sister just three days younger helped tremendously.

“He loves his family fiercely, his sister especially,” Melissa says. “The sun rises and sets on Jocelyn for him.”

Lucky for Givens, he gets plenty of time with his sissy, because Melissa homeschools them. That togetherness leads to plenty of sibling bickering, of course, but it also features some beautiful moments of crafting elaborate tales starring the two of them. After Melissa teaches Jocelyn a lesson, she often finds that her youngest son picked it up, too. 

“He’s closing the gaps from a child who didn’t speak, didn’t know what anything was and who had no experiences to attach learning to, to a boy who now can spell his own name, knows most his letters and sounds, can count to 20 and sings Christmas carols like nobody’s business,” Melissa says. “He has friends, loves playing outside and has even started to love animals (as long as they don’t lick him!).”

Over the last three years, the Edwardses have seen more and more of their newest family member’s true personality shine through. And what they have learned is that Givens is an independent adventurer who never meets a stranger, a wheelchair daredevil with the heart of a NASCAR driver, a backseat song-belter and a macaroni-and-cheese connoisseur who could never be accused of working too hard — unless he’s got his eye on a prize.

“If it is something he really wants, there’s no stopping him,” Melissa says. “His smile is infectious, he feels deep when others are upset (especially his sister) and he has strong opinions that he’s not afraid to tell you about!”

That audience includes the wider community around him, too. Weekly outings include church and a local homeschool co-op, where Givens delights in singing during circle time, and story time at the library, which he decidedly does not enjoy as much.

“He doesn’t love sitting for stories and often asks our very wonderful and patient librarian, ‘Are we done yet?’” Melissa laughs. 

Of course, there are challenges that go far beyond dismissably cute sassiness. Whenever Givens gets sick, it’s a guessing game as to severity (what if his shunt is actually failing instead of just a tummy bug?). He has a stubborn streak that often extends past his parents’ known limits. The balance between his feelings and others’ boundaries is constantly shifting. 

But other facts overshadow those downsides — like the wheelchair races Givens often finds himself in at the children’s hospital (“Men and their cars, kids and their wheelchairs, they are one and the same!”), the whole family attending Hayden’s basketball games, coffee and cartoons in the mornings and Givens’ terrible jokes.

Who wouldn’t want that kind of life? 

“Givens makes us all better people. He’s is a daily reminder of what true joy looks like, joy that doesn’t come from circumstance or possessions,” Melissa says. “He has given us a front row to seat to miracle upon miracle and that’s such a blessing. Watching him grow and progress, seeing where he came from and where he is now, feeling his devotion to everyone in this family — those are all gifts we don’t deserve but change us all in the best ways.” 

One of those ways has a name: the Love Worthy Foundation, a nonprofit the Edwardses started in response to their experience with Givens. It provides monetary grants to adopting families, 13 so far. It has also given more than $2,100 to adoption accounts through organizations like RR.

“As happy as we were to finally have Givens in our arms, we walked away from so many others [in Bulgaria],” says Melissa. “It’s overwhelming seeing all the children who still wait. It’s not much, but we know that Givens is just one of thousands of children who are worthy of the love of a family, and we want to help as much as we can.”

That help may be hard to give, true. And once they hear the Edwardses’ story, people often assume the family is saintly and special. After all, who chooses hard? And why? 

A normal sort of family, that’s who — one that wishes more would stride forward in shaky confidence, knowing they could do hard things, too.

“We stepped forward in faith and continue to lean on God’s strength and guidance daily,” Melissa says. “You just learn as you go and give grace and forgiveness, and love with all you have and it’s worth it.”

“Every moment is worth it.”